Change.

I feel quite sad i have not been able to update this as much as possible...but here goes. This day changed my life forever. Fear..sadness..anger..all in a possible tornado of one. and as i look back i realize anything that may have happened may not be put on a blame as a single ..but as a variety of events that may have led to it. Of course we all change..some for the best..some for the worst..in quite a turn of events..this made me change in a way  i simply cannot describe. My heart felt broken..as my soul did also. I felt like the calls i made this night simply rang and rang..and at the end of the day maybe it was for the best..sometimes they say things happen for a reason..maybe i was meant to be alone this night..i  just wish i could've done something better. i never thought i could be happy to hear such news..and torn to hear another set of news. im doing whatever possible to mend my body..and my mind..as well as my heart. Some people can hurt others in amounts unbearable..and through that is a kind of stubbornness that makes me feel like i could this alone...i can go through anything..alone...i will heal alone. it takes courage..and i'm proud of the work i have accomplished and the people surrounding me. In one of my darkest moments..i found a light..and i will one day heal completely. What nourishes me..also destroys me. Live..Love..change..i'm simply adapting...and in nature..adapting to change..helps one survive.

<3