Day 90. sunny OUT!

I was in an exploring mood today. So here i am..by myself...this is Home. Or at least what i know of a home. I was on the freeway and i stopped..just to get some air..just to relax..just to feel the sun...just to dream for a bit...

we all just ..need to breathe.

Just breathe.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 89. whats Above?

What IS ABOVE? Is it just sky? Stars? Clouds? Hope? Dreams? Who knows?

Looks like im not the only one curious to find out..

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 88. Greatness

 Today was my brother Adrian's (left) 24th birthday. We pregamed it tonight..with a bottle of Jager..from yours truly..Patron from Sir Henry..hurricanes..soco's and cokes..and a Hamburger cake from Ms. Marcy. Thursday night is the real celebration. Here is a photo of us 3..the Three Cruz. 24...21..and 25. Adrian, Linda, Allan. We rarely photograph together..so i wanted at least one for today..i love them..they made part in my weird being..and i get some of my wit and sarcasm from there. There pretty much some of the coolest cats i know. I'm a lucky gal. :)

 Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

p.s. i think they were all pretty..done? :)

day 87. my Landscape..i suppose

It might not fit today's criteria..but its all i have..i wasn't in a shooting mood today..but..here we go..Downtown Redlands..thought it was pretty..awesome.

Im quiet for the day.

Toodles.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

day 86. Night

I'm kind of angry right now. Seems no matter ..where i am..day..or night..a house..a hospital..a park..a book..a magazine..or whatever i read ..i could never learn how to express myself in a way i wish others would understand. it makes no sense. am i blind ..am i missing some sort of fucking link?

its mindfucking quite frankly.

Ugh.
Dirty mouth Linda..dirty.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 85. a weakness

Usually..i think girls would say..clothes..or shoes..are their biggest weakness..like Oh em gee right? Umm..no..to be quite honest..Candy is a big weakness of mine..or the sun ( HISS) i prefer rainy days..but seriously speaking..the biggest weakness i have..is myself. That could be good..or bad..or both..either way..i'll leave it up to life..to find out.

 Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 84. Self-Portrait #6: imperfections

I don't think i have ever felt "perfect"...some days..i just feel more okay with myself than others..but most of the time..i always feel like theres room for improvement..a pinch here..maybe a pinch there..ehh..its human nature i suppose.

 Or maybe a female flaw.either way..im guilty of it.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 83. Free choice.

I usually love LOVE Thursdays..but today..i feel as you can see..not so..*YIPEE*. I kept waking up throughout the night..i could hear the rain hitting my window..it was calming..but GOD it was so cold. i have a heating blanket.and even that couldn't help. I woke up again around 7am..and this time with sneezing and a fever. It is now 5pm..and my fever is at 101. I feel shivvery. is that a word? No right? im dizzy..and everything hurts on me..i say everything because even my EARS. i had so much to do today..but here i am stuck in bed..its not like i could do anything..if you have read Day 82..and my car..but still.. :/ im thankful this is just a cold/fever and not something worse..i hope i get better soon..and i am currently isolating myself from everyone..especially my little nephews..

Hope you all are doing a bit better today.

as for me..im going back to bed.

 i would really love some hot chicken tortilla soup..more blankets..maybe some chocolate..and a hot cup of chamomile tea..bring me some!!
in the meantime im crossing my fingers that my fairy godmother appears with these things.
Poop!

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 82. One of those days. Smh.

 

 We were on our way to get some tickets in Beverly hills for my brother..and right after Vernon st. on the 210w in Azusa...POP POP POP..goes a noise..what was it? Who knows..we pulled up on the side of the freeway and my complete left tire is blown..my BRAND new tire. and after 2 and a half hours of nonsense in the rain..and cold..POP goes another one..Thank..someone for the neighbor on Bayless street. I owe my new friend Brian the construction worker a cake. 

Anyhooz..managed to snap this shot. I absolutely loved it. <3 :) (above)

and this (below) is my poor car. UHHH.

to be quite honest..it could always be worse..i looked a fool snappin' pictures on the side of the freeway..but i do it for you..because if i had to go through it..of course i will share it with you..whoever may be reading this. 

its raining today..and snowing..and i am finally home.

Thank goodness.

<3

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz 

oH and Day 81..proved to be quite lovely actually. :)

81. what a DAY!

Today was such a hectic day. Woke up to tears..some shit..i'm overwhelmed..and i just have to remember to breathe. Someone told me..if you don't like where you're at..change it..im in the process. Work was insane..but im thankful i have a job. Im exhausted..and today is my Friday...Cheers that i get lucky.

"Drinkin' on cheap bottles of wine..Sit talking up all night. Saying things we haven't for a while.."

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 80. Free choice

Sometimes its not even about re-assuring..its simply about..showing affection..any type..with words..or actions..but no one ever realizes..a simple word or action..can make a complete day..at least one of mine.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 79. rainy Rain

i absolutely love it.

Love. Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 78. a part of my Night

So tonight was my first day of interning..sort of anyway. The group (Denis, me, Omar, Angel, and Justin) went to check out a band called  "Champagne Leader" in northern Los Angeles ...and photograph them. While Justin took his new video dolly out..which i must say is incredible. The band was awesome..as were the two that played before them.. the vibe was different..the crowd was young..and the music pounding in your ear was pretty great. 

I like this picture..just because it portrays..how some people who go to shows..should really just stay home..its MUSIC..get your ass up and dance..you can drink anywhere..trust..but feel alive..dance..sing..LIVE.

Kids. smh.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

and this photo was taken by Angel..it's one of my favorites of the night.

day 77. Something misunderstood

I think many misunderstand the color black. Most see it as it representing death...gloom..evil..but I actually view it as a beautiful "absence of color". It's the effort of all the colors which make black..its a group process. I love the mystery behind it..and the powerful statement it gives in whichever way it is portrayed. I love black roses. and no..they are not bloomed this way..This one is a white rose..airbrushed black..which they can do at most florists..It may appear like a rose may appear after several days..dead..but in fact..its quite alive still..BLOOMING. all it takes..is a second look.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 76. st. patrick's Day

'NOPE IM NOT LUCKY IM BLESSED..YES!' :) hope y'all have a great st. Patrick's day.

 Get lucky!!

;)

xoxo 

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 75. A portrait

Recital today..my hurr be all messed up..i'm completely exhausted..its been a long day. I honestly feel like Mr. Pirahnna right there..GRRR. my ankle hurts..and i broke my nails..what a waste..but Portrait of myself today..since..i forgot to warm up today..i'm currently paying for it..and i thought i'd capture what i was thinking at this very moment.

Though i'm not always speaking..i always observe. i absorb..and i ponder.

Love.Love.Love.

-Linda Cruz

Day 74. Shadows..time.

i don't know if this applies to today's criteria..but its what im going with. It's completely sunny today..and theres still shadows here..there's always something..even where it doesn't belong.

It's part of life i suppose.

and my body feels completely drained.

in a good way..but still.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 73. a weakness that could be used as a Strength.

I speak low..but im not shy..i have friends..but i rarely..if ever surround myself in crowds. I have this weakness that i grew up..being careful who i choose to surround myself with..and to be honest..it didn't do me much luck since most of the people were some of the worst kind..anyone could ever meet....i tend to choose to walk alone..rather than with a group of people..and though i know..a group of people could make an impact on a variety of things..my daily life...doesn't consist..with those groups..they consist..with meeting each goal i set each day. So i use it as my strength. The fact that i close off alot of people..but keep the ones i love..close..is a main weakness of mine..i always do it..but to this day..i'm thankful for those that remain..and stood along..because..to be honest..they're my STRENGTH.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 72. An everyday object with a creative perspective.

Numbers..numbers..numbers..they are everywhere..from the ridiculous price of gas at the moment..to school...to work..to how many pancakes i make in the morning..to a simple game of Uno. 1..2..3.. I don't know if you can count numbers as an object..but i do..seeing as i do see it..every..single..day.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 71. two Sides

There are two sides to everything..but there is also two sides of everyone..Good..bad..young..old..mistakes..accomplishments..and everything in between. Todays photo i will dedicate to a young man who has helped me become..the person i am today. From school dances..to graduations..to random missions..to his 22nd birthday..which is (today) he has been my little light at the end of the tunnel. I can't explain to you..how i was clearly..the first day of middle school..or even..how i felt today when i was having dinner..its..so much emotion..so simple..yet complex..but this lad..has been there..through my most proudest moments..to my most heartbreaking ones. I can't write this post without crying at least one tear..because without his help..i wouldn't be me. He held my hand..even in the moments when i most pushed everyone..and throughout the years..he will always be my Jack. and i will never have enough days to apologize for any or every little thing that i may have done to make one of his sunny days...cloudy.. and Even if one day..we never speak again..I will always have him in my heart..because i absolutely love and adore him.

I simply cannot put in words the journey it has been. The old side..The young naive girl..who took everything for granted..lived each day..as if tomorrow was certain..turned into .this young woman you may see today..the giggly..happy.."lets talk about nothing and just live"/Linda who thanks the stars for each day. really because of him.THIS side. My best side. You helped me grow in each and every possible way.

Love.Love.Love.

-Linda Cruz

Day 70. at your Door.

I went to my friends just a bit ago..and we were discussing doors..and the various meanings that they give to us..and i had several..but to be honest..doors are an entrance.but can also be used as exits..doors can symbolize decisions..as well as closures..

i suppose what they mean is..i feel like im always knocking..and someone is on the other side..i see the light under the door..but no one answers..even if they were to answer..to be quite honest..i don't know who i am even expecting to be on the other side. If its even a person i'm expecting..or maybe just..a decision..who knows?

Happy Friday y'all.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 69. Free Choice

 It was incredibly sunny..and for the first time in a long while..i didn't mind it..This..is Hesperia..long..roads..and desert all around..i get so overwhelmed sometimes..but its still Home.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 68. a constant thought.

I always wonder what my life would be like if i were to have been born in a different decade. I usually wonder..about the golden 70's. The decade of free love..drugs...disco dancing..feminist shock..peace..world..

would i have still been the same me that i know of?

Would i have contributed to any of the above? Probably...probably not..who knows?

I just wonder. Unfortunately i can't call Doc..and go back in time..BUT..i do know who i am now..and what the lovely 90's did to me..as well as the new millennium and how it has influenced me..maybe negatively..maybe positively..but nevertheless..INFLUENCED me..to become..Me.

Eh?

Love.Love.Love.

-Linda Cruz

p.s. excuse the fake..blunt...how the hell was i suppose to know how to roll a real one? All these years of listening to Snoop and i still dunno how. Word!

Day 67. One day..

One day..this will be where my lovely Red Audi will be parked...or Range Rover..HELL to be quite honest i wouldn't mind riding my bike to work..with this title..as long as i would be content and satisfied with my life.

Sunny day today..maybe one day..this sign..will be in a rainy city..quite of the sorts..like Seattle..or Boston..Chicago..who knows..

One day.

This will be me.

:)

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 66. somethings Just not clear.

 

My life story..obviously..im still writing it..one day at a time..some chapters are incredibly interesting..others are rather odd..some are just plain ridiculous..but most of the time..its very Linda-ish. Good thing since it is my story right? I hope to have one hell of an ending. 

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 65. Emotion..ehh?

 

Speechless..trivial..and confused as a holy monkey..all these emotions in one week. Sighs. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I'm just about to tuck it in..and put it inside..you know..where its suppose to be? I guess i express myself more than others..some say its good..i don't know..i'm not too sure of that anymore. Ehh.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 64. An adventure

Today was eventful. Sighs. Woke up this morning to my phone not working properly..went to 93243242398 different stores to try and repair it..no luck..gave up..went to an event that my group was holding to raise awareness..did a booth for a few hours..kind of fun..kind of hot..but i'm happy i got to participate and give back a bit. Did i mention today was extremely HOT??? ahh. Here we are at Union station in Los Angeles..picking up two of the sweetest cats i know.

Angel served as my model today..got a few shots of the station..but i still liked the traffic ones better..so heres one.."beep beep" ..gotta love L.A TRAFFIC! 

Hope y'all had a great one.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 63. Encounter in my day..

I came home from work today to this.

Sighs. :) The big brother..this is him waiting before he goes out on his big Friday night. Hah. Love him.

Love.Love.Love.

-Linda Cruz

Day 62. self Portrait #5

I have had an extremely terrible headache the last few days. and i keep stepping on these DAMN TOYS!! sighs.

Love.Love.Love

-Linda Cruz

Day 61. Free choice

 

My brother was on his way to drop off my car this morning..and POP goes my tire. Just look at it. completely bald..even the wires were out. I KNOW i know..how could i drive like that? well..i guess i have been too busy..or too stupid to be able to tell..probaly both. Either way..i paid for it today..thankfully with money..and not with my life. Got my baby some brand spankin' new tires. and my brother taught me how to change a tire as well..well.he taught me and my 5 year old nephew. THANKS BRO. i love you.

Love.Love.Love.

-Linda Cruz

Day 60. People

I wasn't suppose to stay as long as i did last night..and i shouldn't have drunk as much as i did..and i shouldn't have said alot of things..but then..i remember..IT HAPPENS. 
Had a blast. 
Thanks to those who helped me forget.
even if it was for just a bit.
and thanks to the adios.